


😈😇🥖

by katychan666, Shiorino



Series: Texting Series [12]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Good Asmodeus, Humor, M/M, Texting, emojis, unamused magnus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 22:50:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18061697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiorino/pseuds/Shiorino
Summary: All Magnus wants is to have a peaceful dinner with Alec. But his dad (and uncle) have other plans 😈😇





	😈😇🥖

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shiorino](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shiorino/gifts).



> So a little SPN and SH crossover... Again 😏🔥✨

Magnus was annoyed as he heard his phone buzzing. It was his father  _ again _ and he was gritting his teeth, because his old man just wouldn’t leave him alone. Okay, Magnus loved his father don’t get him wrong, but enough was enough as he was rolling his eyes. He warded his loft from his father randomly popping in, but unfortunately he couldn’t ward his phone away from his texts. He tried, he really did, but technology wasn’t cooperating and he sighed sadly when his phone buzzed again, leaning down in his couch and he just rolled his eyes. Asmodeus tried calling, but Magnus didn’t pick up, so the king of Edom had to text. Magnus was rolling his eyes as he was massaging his temples.

 

Ah, yes. Asmodeus kept randomly popping into his loft, that was why he needed to put the wards up especially for Asmodeus. Alexander was objecting at first, but then even he had gotten tired of the random visits. It had gotten to the point that he was hanging over there all of the time, not giving Alec any privacy in their own home. It was kind of annoying and Alec had to agree with Magnus, even though he loved the man.  His father in law was awesome, but…. everything had its limits. 

 

Still, he was curious, so he took his phone into his hands and rolled his eyes where he saw the amount of unread texts and tapped on his father’s name, pressing his lips together as he tried not to laugh. So, this was the king of Edom? He was supposed to be a fallen  _ angel _ ? He was acting like a mere child, throwing a temper tantrum. Then again, he knew he shouldn’t be too surprised. Angels… they were… well, their personalities were quite something and Magnus only rolled his eyes. 

 

**Asmodeus:** _ Magnus, I think something is wrong with your warding! I tried portalling before, but I can’t! What happened???  _ 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

**Asmodeus:** _ Hmmm. The energy is different this time. Did you do something? _

**Asmodeus:** _ Magnus, did you put the wards up because of me? Because you want to get rid of me???? Magnus! Reply back  _ 😱😱😱😱

**Asmodeus:** _ This is your father speaking!  _ 😈😈😈😈😈

**Asmodeus:** _ If you don’t reply, you’ll be grounded  _ 😈😈😈

 

Magnus scoffed. Asmodeus had gotten so desperate for sure and he was only laughing, because texts just kept on coming. And coming. There was no end to them and Magnus was only shaking his head. 

 

**Asmodeus:** _ Maggy! I swear on my father that I will ground you  _ 😈😈😈😈

**Asmodeus:** _ Take pity on your old man  _ 😭😭😭😭😭😭

**Asmodeus:** _ You don’t reply to my texts or my calls. You’ve warded me out of your loft  _ 😭😭😭

**Asmodeus:** _ Did I do something wrong? Is it something that I said? If so, I apologise. My son!!!  _ 😭😭😭😭

**Asmodeus:** _ Stop ignoring me! I just got you back after centuries of you ignoring me  _ .😭  _ Come back, son!!!  _ 😭😭😭😭

 

Magnus was embarrassed then. His father was embarrassing, in a good way, but still. This was getting ridiculous. What was so important that he needed to tell him in person?! He could just tell him over the text. Nope, he wasn’t going to give up and let his father win again. He was setting his foot down and showing his father who was in charge of situation. Magnus was a grown up now and wasn’t going to let his father boss him around!

 

“Magnus, your father is crying,” said Alec as he stepped into the living room, coming from the kitchen and Magnus rolled his eyes when Alec showed him the texts. So, his father decided to text Alexander as well. Well, it didn’t come as a response and Alec was biting on his lip, feeling kind of bad for the man now. All he wanted to do was to just hang out. “Maybe you should put the warding down after all,” said Alec and rubbed the back of his neck and Magnus’ jaw dropped.

 

“Nuh huh, no way,” said Magnus and crossed his arms on top of his chest. “All I want is to enjoy a relaxing evening with my boyfriend. I don’t want my father to be here again,” he grumbled and rubbed his forehead. “Do you know how annoying he was yesterday?” went on by ranting Magnus and Alec snorted when he remembered Asmodeus and his dad jokes. Well, he wasn't annoying in Alec’s opinion, but he was amusing. Alec knew that Asmodeus was coming for a good place, just wanting to fit it, but he was embarrassing Magnus in the process, so he understood Magnus’ point of view. He’d be the same if it was his mother attacking them like this. 

 

“True, but all he wants is some company. He’s lonely,” said Alec.

 

Magnus rolled his eyes. “This is exactly what he wants, for us to feel sorry for him. He’s a good manipulator,” said Magnus and rolled his eyes. “He has stuff to do, like to run hell,” he then said and crossed his arms on top of his chest. “You don’t know the temper tantrum he threw to get the position as the king, so it’s his responsibility now,” said Magnus and rolled his eyes.

 

Alec chuckled when he saw that Magnus was annoyed again. Annoyed and upset Magnus was strangely adorable and he just wrapped his arms around him and made Magnus’ annoyance disappear a little bit. Until his phone buzzed  _ again _ and Magnus’ jaw dropped when he read Asmodeus’ new text.

 

**Asmodeus:** _ Okay. Fine. If you won’t reply, then I’ll have to just ask your uncle to help me  _ 😈

 

Alec looked at him and frowned. Magnus had an uncle? Magnus panicked a bit, but then relaxed when he remembered that since Asmodeus was technically an angel, his warding worked against angels as well.

 

**Magnus:** _ Be my guest, the loft is warded against demons and angels  _ 😎

**Asmodeus:** _ The warding doesn’t work against Archangels, does it?  _ 😂😂😂😂

 

“Ah, crap,” said Magnus and rolled his eyes. Great, now that was just great. “This is just fantastic,” grumbled Magnus and threw his phone onto the couch and just stomped into the kitchen, Alec narrowing his eyebrows. Angels? Archangels? Wait, what was going on?! He hurried after Magnus, because he had so many questions and he needed answers! 

 

“Magnus, what is-”

 

“Alexander, we need to leave,” said Magnus as he was pacing around the kitchen.

 

“But the dinner!” said Alec as he was cooking before. It was now in the oven and was going to be ready any time now! Alec worked hard and he didn’t want to  _ leave.  _ “I didn’t slave off in the kitchen for hours for nothing,” he then whined and frowned.

 

“We can eat it somewhere else,” said Magnus.

 

“Magnus, no,” said Alec and then pouted, giving Magnus his puppy eyed look, to which he knew his boyfriend was weak and in the end, he just gave up and groaned.  

 

“You’re lucky you’re this adorable, how can I say no to this face?” asked Magnus and then he sat onto the kitchen counter and was just trying to calm down. He just really wasn’t in the mood to be in the presence of his father or any of his uncles. Why was his family so extra?! Ugh. It’s the burden he had to carry.

 

“Why are you in a hurry to leave?” asked Alec confused.

 

“Because my father will be coming soon and he isn’t going to come alone,” said Magnus, his face darkening. Alec perked up at that. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but is one peaceful evening too much to ask for?!”

 

“Who’s coming?” asked Alec.

 

“I don’t know who he’ll drag along,” said Magnus and rolled his eyes. “He’s planning on dragging one of my Archangel uncles here and let me tell you all of them are…  _ sheesh, _ ” he said and shook his head. Alec’s heart jumped. Angels! By Raziel, say it isn’t so! Oh, wait! This was kind of exciting. Magnus’ family were angels! But of course, it all made sense. Magnus  _ was _ an angel! He was-

 

Fluttering sound was heard from the living room and Magnus groaned.

 

“What was that?!”

 

“Nothing good,” said Magnus. 

 

“Magnus, tell your father to leave me alone!” roared the voice from the living room and then the door of the kitchen suddenly opened and Alec narrowed his eyes when quite a short man stepped inside. Wait, that was an Archangel?! For real?! Magnus groaned and hopped off the counter.

 

“That’s an Archangel?” asked Alec and narrowed his eyes when Magnus nodded. “Kind of short,” he blurted out and Magnus snorted, but the other didn’t look too impressed.

 

“Kind of-” grumbled the Angel and then gave Magnus an unimpressed look. “I wouldn’t test your luck too much, cause I’ll climb up there and-”

 

“Alexander, meet Gabriel,” said Magnus, deciding to break up the fight. 

 

“Um, hi,” said Alec.

 

“Uh huh,” said Gabriel, not too impressed with the Nephilim, mainly because of the comment about his height before. That was a touchy subject. He ignored Alec for the time being and stomped towards Magnus. “Your father, Magnus, is relentless. I mean look at this,” whined Gabriel and showed Magnus his phone. So! Asmodeus attacked Gabriel with texts as well, when he could just portal himself over there?! Hilarious!

 

**Asmodeus:** _ Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh!!!!!!!! _

**Asmodeus:** ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

**Gabriel:** _ Leave me alone! _

**Asmodeus: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭**

**Asmodeus:** _ You’re a terrible older brother  _ 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

**Asmodeus:** _ Don’t you wanna know what happened to me?! _

**Gabriel:** _ Not really, but I know you’ll tell me anyway. So go ahead  _ 🙄

**Asmodeus:** _ My son is ignoring me  _ 😒

**Gabriel:** _ So?  _ 😒  _ What do you want me to do about it???? _

**Asmodeus:** _ He warded his place so that I can’t come there  _ 😭😭😭😭😭

**Gabriel:** _ Smart boy, can totally see why  _ 🤣🤣🤣🤣

**Asmodeus:** _ Don’t be a dick  _ 😒  _ and help me _

**Gabriel:** _ Gotta go, finally alone with  _ 🦌

**Gabriel: 😏😏😏😏😏😏**

**Asmodeus:** _ What the fuck????  _ 🦌 _?????? _

**Asmodeus:** _ You’re blowing me off for a fucking Moose?! _

**Gabriel:** _ Hey, watch it! That’s my boyfriend you’re talking about  _ 😒😒

**Asmodeus:** _ You’re dating a… Moose?!  _ 🤢🤢

**Asmodeus:** _ Now I know why dad left heaven. _

**Gabriel:** _ No it’s not…  _ 🤦♂️ 🤦♂️ 

**Gabriel:** _ It’s nickname for my… you know never mind.  _

**Gabriel:** _ Oh, he brought  _ 🍭 🍬 🍫🍩 🍪.  _ Gotta go! _

**Asmodeus:** _ What? No! Again you and your sweets! No you will help me! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Gabe, reply! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Gabe! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Gabe! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Gabe! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Gabe! _

**Gabriel:** _ WHAT? I SWEAR TO DAD I’LL STRANGLE YOU! _

**Asmodeus:** _ Help me get to my son!  _ 😢

**Gabriel:** _ No _

**Asmodeus: 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢**

**Asmodeus:** _Everyone hates me. My son doesn’t want to talk to me. My older brothers are all ignoring me. Luci left hell, so I have to run it alone. Poor me. Who will ever love poor Asmodeus?! It’s okay, I’m used to it. Not even Lilith loved me. All I have are my dragons, I’ll go to them. They understand me, they love me. Yes. Okay, that’s the last time you’ll ever hear from me_ 😢 _I’ll disappear_ 😢😢😢😢

**Gabriel:** _ …. _

**Gabriel:** _ Fine, I’ll go talk to him _

**Asmodeus: 💕 💞 💓 💗 💖💕 💞 💓 💗 💖💕 💞 💓 💗 💖💕 💞 💓 💗 💖**

 

“He wouldn’t stop, for fuck’s sake,” grumbled Gabriel. “Just drop the warding and let your father visit,” said Gabriel as his eyes were begging his nephew. “Please, I’m begging you. Oh, the phone is buzzing again, I can’t with him anymore,” said Gabriel and just turned his phone off. 

 

“But he’s here all the freaking time,” whined Magnus.

 

“Maybe you should listen to Gabriel,” said Alec, chiming in and Gabriel was quick to agree with him. “I mean he could stay for the dinner,” said Alec and Magnus’ jaw dropped. Now he had done it!

 

“Dinner? What dinner?!” asked Gabriel, suddenly intrigued.

 

“Just something I prepared,” said Alec sheepishly and Gabriel went closer. 

 

“Don’t keep me waiting, I need details,” said Gabriel. “Is there cake?”

 

“No,” said Alec and Gabriel sighed. “But I bought pie,” he added quickly and Magnus face-palmed himself.  

 

“Apple?”

 

“Cherry.”

 

“Perfect,” said Gabriel and Alec looked at Magnus who was shaking his head in the background. Alec didn’t know what he was doing, just making the situation worse! “Magnus, drop the warding,” he said and in the end, Magnus only snapped his fingers and admitted defeat. “Say, Shadowhunter, how many people do you think could feast on your dinner?”

 

“Well, I did make quite a lot and-”

 

“Great,” said Gabriel. “I’ll go fetch my Moose,” said Gabriel and suddenly disappeared, Alec’s jaw dropping. There was a Moose coming to the dinner?! He was highly confused as he was looking at Magnus, who was… already making a plan to pack his things and leave. But soon enough, Asmodeus portalled in, running to his son.

 

“Yay, finally we’re reunited again, my son,” said Asmodeus and hugged Magnus.

 

“Oh, joy,” said Magnus and rolled his eyes. 

 

“Where’s Gabe?!”

 

“He went for his Moose,” said Alec and pressed his lips together. “It doesn’t make sense. Why does he need a Moose for the dinner?”

 

“Your uncle is dating a Moose, Magnus,” said Asmodeus and Alec snorted. 

 

“Weird one, isn’t he?” asked Alec.

 

“Oh, yes,” said Asmodeus. “You have no idea.”

 

“Magnus, where are you going?” asked Alec as Magnus was slowly walking out of the kitchen. 

 

“Out.”

 

“No, you need to stay,” said Alec with a pout and Magnus wanted to smack himself, but the pout got to him again and he finally accepted his faith. So there was going to be a  _ family _ dinner with his dad, uncle, Alexander and a Moose apparently. How fun. 

 

Alec was looking forward to seeing this  _ Moose _ , but as it turned out, it was just a nickname for someone called Sam. How disappointing, he wanted to see a Moose. The dinner was… interesting, Magnus not knowing if he should be laughing or crying half of the time. It was a lot to handle, but in the end, it turned out to be quite fun after all. Maybe. Kind of.

 

Then Asmodeus announced he’d be doing another family dinner with more of the family and Magnus went back to disagreeing, but Alexander was fascinated. He was going to be meeting more angels. How fun!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank u for reading ^^  
> Leave a comment if u liked it :)


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